Are you asking: Who usually pays for the wedding? We look at following tradition about what the bride's family pays for and what the groom's family pays for. Cooks Carriages offer wedding horse drawn carriage hire for Essex and London. Find out more about who usually pays for the wedding.

Who Pays for the Wedding?

If you’re in the process of planning your wedding, one of the first questions you’ll likely face is who pays for the wedding. Traditionally, it has been viewed that the bride's parents are responsible for the majority of wedding costs, however, in today's modern world, things may not be so cut and dried.

Couples may feel they should pay for their own wedding, that both sets of parents should contribute, or that each party should cover a certain expense. As in many aspects of wedding planning, who pays for the wedding is largely up to personal preference, with the modern couple having more flexibility when deciding who pays for the wedding.

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Do I Have to Follow Tradition?

It’s certainly not a requirement to do so, but within traditional wedding etiquette, it is thought that the bride’s mother and father pay for the vast majority of the wedding expenses. Looking back at history, it is not even completely clear how this tradition began. But some think that it developed out of the practice of the bride's family paying a dowry, essentially a payment, to the groom.

There are many people who stick quite strictly to this old tradition, but it is not at all considered to be necessary. There are a lot of reasons why a bride and groom may decide to take a more modern approach to this aspect of the wedding.

For example, if the bride and groom want a wedding that would cost more than the parent's budget would allow for. Parent's paying for the wedding often means that they have a large say in the organisation. Some couples would prefer to make all the decisions themselves so decide to pay out of their own pocket.

When wedding costs are being covered by parents, the following arrangement is most common. Items such as the stationery, attire, reception venue, food, decorations and entertainment are typically taken care of by the bride’s family, with some or all of the expenses being covered by the groom’s family.

As each family’s financial situation will differ greatly from the next, each wedding’s costs may vary considerably, so it’s important for both sets of parents to discuss who will be responsible for which costs before any money is spent.

One of the most important parts of the wedding which the bride's family traditionally pay for is the wedding dress. They will also pay for any other additional accessories for the bride's outfit, for example, her shoes, jewellery, or veil. In some cases, the bridesmaid's dresses will also be fully paid for by the bride's parents.

Though it is often more common for the bridesmaids to arrange their own outfits between themselves. The only part of the groom's wedding outfit which is traditionally paid for by the bride's side of the family is his ring. Of course, the groom will pick the ring out himself, but it is typically up to the bride's parents to cover the cost.

It is also expected that the bride’s family are responsible for organising the rehearsal dinner, plus taking care of the accommodation, meals and entertainment for the bridal party. Unless the groom’s family has offered to help out, they will also take care of the honeymoon arrangements.

Finally, any hired transport for the bride and the groom is commonly paid for by the bride's family. This can mean hiring a limousine, a carriage, a wedding car, or something else entirely. The same goes for the fees of any photographers or videographers that have been hired or the day. This includes the costs of having the photos printed or burned to a DVD.

Depending upon their financial situation, they may also help out with other wedding costs too. In the past, the groom's family would typically pay for the couple's honeymoon. 

Nowadays, it is becoming more popular for the couple to ask for money from their wedding guests, which can contribute towards the costs of the honeymoon. 

Traditionally, wedding guests would be asked to bring gifts to fill the married couple's home together, but as most couples already live together before marriage in modern times this is not necessary.

Who Pays for the Engagement Party?

Although hosting an engagement party is becoming increasingly popular, it is not seen as a necessity, and certainly not a tradition. However, if the couple decides to have one, it is usually thrown by the bride's family, who usually picks up the tab, either alone or with help from the groom's family.

The more traditional route would be for the bride's family to host the party, while the groom’s family organise a separate event. 

Who Pays for the Engagement Announcements?

Traditionally, the cost of engagement announcements was the responsibility of the groom’s family. This cost would include the creation and posting of the cards, as well as any associated engagement party details.

However, in some cases, the bride’s family may offer to help in this regard.

Who Pays for the Wedding Reception?

The wedding reception is usually one of the largest expenses within a wedding budget and is traditionally the responsibility of the bride’s family. This cost will include the venue, food and drinks, as well as decorations, entertainment and any other associated costs.

It is possible to share the cost with the groom’s family, so it may be worth discussing this before committing to any payments. 

Who Pays for the Rehearsal Dinner?

Typically, the rehearsal dinner will be taken care of by the groom’s family and will include all associated costs, such as the venue, food and drinks and decorations. However, depending upon the couple’s financial situation, it is perfectly acceptable to ask both sets of parents to contribute or ask that each family takes turns paying for the cost of the dinner.

When it comes to who pays for the wedding, there is no hard and fast rule. Every couple’s circumstances will be unique and it is down to personal preference as to who is responsible for the various wedding costs. It is important to keep communication open and be willing to compromise when necessary to ensure everyone involved is happy.

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